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“If you wait until you’re 36 to get married, your folks are just so happy you’re getting married.”He even sensed a change of heart in his grandmother when she met his then-girlfriend, now-wife, who is of Japanese heritage.

At the same time, Golin said he “received this counter-message,” meaning he was also taught by his community and family to “judge everybody as an individual.Riley, herself, is Jewish and married a man who is not.I asked her if intermarrying tended to increase when, like me or Sex and the City’s Charlotte, we get older and, to be frank, we’re tired of the canceled drinks, the last-minute dates, the frustration.“I definitely found that the older you are when you marry, the more likely you are to marry out,” Riley told me.Like myself, Golin was raised in the Conservative Judaism, so less observant than the more traditional Orthodox community but more so than Reform.“I grew up with messaging from my parents, my rabbi, and my community that I should only be with Jewish women.My mother was born in a displaced person’s camp in Berlin right after the war because her parents lost their homes in the Holocaust.

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