Stop being accommodating in relationships

Have you ever found yourself in the middle of an activity at work that you really wished you hadn’t agreed to?Maybe you ended up joining the company softball team, even though you hate sports and are embarrassed by your inability to throw in a straight line.It can also make you feel inauthentic, because when you’re smiling on the outside—despite feeling frustrated on the inside—you’re essentially pretending to be someone who you’re not.In fact, research suggests that smiling to appease others when you’re not genuinely feeling happy, is linked to a decreased sense of well-being, and “withdraw[al] from work.” So what’s a people pleaser to do?Sadly, families are not immune to the poisonous lashings of a toxic relationship.Though families and relationships can feel impossibly tough at times, they were never meant to ruin.A good rule of thumb is to consider, “If this request was being made of someone else, what would I think?

In other words, when you say “no,” the other person simply says “OK,” and that’s the end of it.However, there may be an instance in which advocating for yourself results in conflict.Now, it could be that the other person genuinely needs your help or expertise, and that’s part of being on a team.Make sure to consider your own needs with the needs of those around you, and you’ll be able to find the right balance. Patricia Thompson is a corporate psychologist and the President of Silver Lining Psychology, a management consulting firm in which she provides executive coaching, team building, and personality assessment for hiring.If toxic people were an ingestible substance, they would come with a high-powered warning and secure packaging to prevent any chance of accidental contact.

Leave a Reply